For College Kids: How To Eat Alone in the Dining Hall

So many depressed and lonely college students walk into my office describing the specter of eating alone in a campus dining hall as inspiring nothing short of anguish. Also bewilderment. How, they wonder could this problem even exist? There are after all, tons of kids and only a few dining halls. It was supposed to be fun. What about those lively cafeteria photos on the web site? "What's wrong with me that too many times I have to walk to dinner alone in search of a familiar face, or sit at a table feeling ignored, or worse, have to simply sit alone?" The answer is, nothing is wrong. The idea that there are a stream of dinner companions and endless bright mealtime conversations, is a fantasy. The fact that friends are not always available to eat with you, that students feel invisible during some conversations, that people you know may have made plans to eat specifically with one person or another is far more common.

On the surface it might seem the big reason for the discomfort is loneliness. After all, isn't it more fun to eat with someone? Well, yes. But that's not really the problem. It's not that you can't stand to eat alone. If you were eating in front of your computer in your room you'd be fine. That's because you know that no one is looking at you. And if no one sees what you're doing, they can't be drawing nasty, sad or embarrassing conclusions about you.

More...